Loosing a child to cancer
Losing a child is one of the most devastating experiences a parent can go through Parents may be traumatized and have feelings of blame and guilt..
When you lose a loved one, your love for them does not go away; your love can never die.
“The loss is immeasurable, but so is the love left behind.”
The Little Moon
You can Read more about Luna and her moms journey Luanthelittlemoon.
When Luna was 2 months old, she started to have blood in her diapers her parents where worried we all where but not cancer level worried. She was seen by her pediatrician and scheduled to meet with other doctors to find the cause of the blood in her urine.
A few days later the blood got so bad that they rushed her to the ER where a CT scan showed that she had a large mass on her right kidney and cancer in her lungs.
They told us she had Wilms Tumor and that if she had to have cancer that this was the one. It had a very high survival rate.
Shortly after at only 2 and half months old Luna had her kidney removed. She started chemo at St Judes hospital. Luna and to be put under every day for radiation and was getting heavy doses of chemo at the same time
A week or so later her doctor told us that she had a different cancer called MRT. It was a very rare and aggressive cancer, only 20-25 kids got it a year in America.
Malignant Rhabdoid Tumor
What is a malignant rhabdoid tumor?
A malignant rhabdoid tumor is a rare childhood tumor that commonly starts in the kidneys but also can occur in other soft tissues or in the brain, where it is referred to as atypical teratoid rhabdoid tumor (ATRT). These tumors occur most commonly in infants and toddlers. The average age of diagnosis is 15 months old. There are about 20 to 25 new cases of malignant rhabdoid tumor diagnosed each year in the U.S. Cells from malignant rhabdoid tumors in children can spread to other areas of the body.
On September 10th we found out she was cancer free, Luna continued her cheamo treatments it was a relief knowing she would be okay but there was always the fear that it would come back
Luna was doing great since remission. She was gaining weight and eating well, everything was perfect. We only enjoyed her remission for two months before her oncologist told us her cancer was back and that she was going to die. They couldn’t help her. Her tumor was touching her liver and muscles and she also had more in her lungs
Luna went to heaven on December 12, 2021, and now is in the arms of Jesus
How to deal with a child dying of cancer?
What does it feel like?
Nothing is more devastating than the death of a child. Families wonder how they will ever survive the loss.
Everyone grieves differently, for different lengths of time, and with different intensity. There is no standard set of emotions after the loss of a child.
No parent anticipates the death of a child. Parents aren’t expected to live longer than their offspring. It’s vital to understand that the size of your loss is not determined by how long your kid lived. At any age, the death of a child is devastating.
I will always remember the day she was born the first bottle I gave her.
Losing a child or grandchild in my case to cancer.
You may discover that you are also grieving for the goals and plans you had for your child, the unrealized potential, and the experiences you will never share. If you lose your only kid, you may feel as if you’ve lost your parental identity as well as the potential of having grandchildren. The anguish of these losses will remain with you for the rest of your life. However, most parents eventually find a way forward and rediscover happiness and significance in their lives.
Overwhelming sorrow and despair, making it difficult to complete everyday duties or even get out of bed.
One of my most cherished memories will be rocking her the night before she passed away telling her how much I loved her whispering in her ear, merry Christmas, Happy Birthday, Congratulations pawpaw is so proud of you all the things I would never get to say to her I will never get to see her walk are talk her first steps there will be no school plays are weekend soccer games I will never get to yell her name when she scores the winning goal, so I told her that night all the things I would mess out on.
I was so hard seeing her slowly turn for the worse seeing her weak body not able to hold herself up. You could see and feel the large tumor in her back I knew our time was precious and her time on this earth was short.
I am so proud of her parents they took such great care of her I am grateful they both where able to spend all their time with her the last few weeks comforting and taking care of her.
We will miss you Luna you will never be forgotten.
Always be gentle and don’t assume unrealistic expectations, whether you’re grieving the death of a grandchild or helping someone who is. There is no set length of time for grief to last.
Read More About Luna and her mom. https://lunathelittlemoon.wordpress.com/blog/